Once upon a time, I wished Mary Poppins would show up at my house, magic carpet bag in hand, so we could jump into a rendition of supercalifragilisticexpialidocious. This never happened, of course, and instead I had to settle with watching the film and taking in the Broadway musical. As a tried and true Disney fan, imagine my excitement when I found out there was a reboot.
With the premiere of Mary Poppins Returns, it got me thinking. As a kid, I always wanted to dive into Mary Poppins’ bag — who knew what was hiding in the carry-all. Instead of a folding chair or medicine, what if Mary Poppins presented unattainable, never-before-created beauty staples? Sounds crazy, right? Well, about as crazy as dancing penguins.
Below is a very short — could be infinitely longer — Mary Poppins beauty wish list:
1. A spoonful of sugar may help the medicine go down, but it would be even better if a spoonful of sugar could help hair grow back overnight (or overplucked eyebrows). We have all instantly regretted a haircut and consequently googled ‘how to grow hair back fast’. The answer is always that it will take time. But what if Mary Poppins could solve that?
2. Coloring your hair can be a fun — going from black to blonde or brunette to purple — but it is a long and expensive task. Plus, trends for hair are constantly changing, and what if you don’t like it? One sip from a magical drink and your hair will transform into whatever you wish for a day. No commitments, no salon bill, no bleach.
3. There is nothing worse than the hassle of applying body lotion. First, you are too wet. Then, you have to wait to get dressed. And let’s not even talk about the stickiness. In-shower body lotion? Not a fan of those either. Enter the bag. Imagine a world where there is self-applying body lotion, with no stickiness and no hassle. Oh, and let’s add in a hand cream that keeps your hands hydrated for 24 hours with one application.
4. Mood rings are so 1993, but mood perfume, well that would be revolutionary. Let people know exactly how you feel without having to speak a word. And don’t worry — even if you are in a foul mood, the perfume will still have an appealing scent. Instead of reading your aura, people can smell your emotion.
5. Taking your makeup off may be one of the most important steps before bed (second to washing your face), but it can be the most annoying. Does anyone actually like removing their makeup? How about a button, one push and your makeup will instantly disappear, leaving a squeaky-clean face ready for your skincare routine? Now that would be cutting-edge — and get you in bed quicker.
6. Sunscreen that lasts for a week! Sunscreen is one of the most important steps in your morning regimen, but reapplying is often forgotten or ignored. Step into a yet-to-be-created concoction with a full-body sunscreen spray (no fuss!) and practice skin safety with a futuristic extra-long-lasting sunscreen, no hourly reapplication needed. I have to believe Mary Poppins would approve of the protection.
7. And it all comes back to that spoonful of sugar. Grab another and see what you will look like as you age through the years. A look into the future can help you prepare for which skin concerns to treat, or it will give insight into just how good your genes really are.
Illustrations by Caroline Smith